Invitation Etiquette

Ok - so my cousin is getting married. They decided to get married in Hawaii so a lot of family members are obviously not going to be attending because it is so far away. I never got an invitation to the wedding. Now, even though I would not be able to go…at least spend the $2 on the invitation to send me. However, they did send me an invitation to the bridal shower and the reception that they are going to have here in town before they go to Hawaii to get married. So, I was not invited formally to the wedding but you want me to go to the other events…just for my gift - so it seems. I just find this to be very rude and just in poor taste. What do you think?